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Wrote 90% of it in grade 12


One day I was sitting in my room
Having some cones and drinking some goon
I went to stand but I fell over
Then I realized I wasnít sober
I put on my pants and had a smoke
Looked at my watch and I was stoked
It was 1 oíclock, time for a nap
Went to sleep with my bong in my lap
I soon sat up and looked at my watch
I spilt the bong water all over my crotch
I yelled out "SHIT" and knocked it away
That fucking bong is going to pay
Went to the can to have a long piss
Flopped it out and prayed I didnít miss
Whizzed forever, thought Iíd never stop
I flushed the can and went for a chop
Oh thereís none left, itís all looking bleak
I started off with a pound last week
So I went to my dealerís to buy some dope
I really needed it I just couldnít cope
I gave the dealer my hard-earned cash
He then gave me my much-needed stash
I went outside with my new fresh snappy
I smelt the goods and I felt happy
So I went for a celebration chop
I started to pull but I saw a cop
ďWhat are you doing?Ē he asked of me
ďWell Iím pulling a cone, canít ya see?Ē
Couldnít make up an explanation
So I went with him down the station
Got put in jail for possession
But the guys in there were having a session
I joined in and we got so fucked
We forgot being in jail sucked
The next day, some one posted bail
So I finally got out of jail
My bud was the one that bailed me
What a good mate, he set me free
We call him Iron Lungs itís no wonder why
You canít out-smoke him, I know, Iíve tried
We couldnít chat, as he had to go
Cos he had a date with some 5 buck hoe
I was so stoned that I couldnít think
So I went down the pub to have a drink
Had a couple of shots at the bar
was so screwed up, I was like "duh"
They refused to serve me, so I chucked a fit
I called the bartender a stupid git
He said "piss off", so I yelled some more
He lifted and threw me out the door
I stood up in a semi-conscious state
Had to get home, didnít feel too great
So I started to waddle on home
I got lost and I started to roam
I found a snappy and yelled out ďshit!Ē
There was heaps of fucking speed in it
I finally got home to have a snooze
Slept for 12 hours, then hit then booze
Fuck! I just realised what I forgot!
I have speed and Iíll mix it with pot!
I smoked it all and got fully cranked
Man this is good, being so tanked
I ran around until I fell down
Man thatís funny, Iím such a clown
Managed to get myself down the street
I really needed something to eat
I bought myself a packet of chips
I was so fucked, I couldnít move my lips
On the way home I fell in a gutter
ďI canít moveĒ I think I muttered
Pretty soon, I got bored being straight
I went next door to that dealer I hate
I canít stand him, he gives me the shits
Doesnít matter, he sells good trips
Got a superman trip, thisíll be cool
Only cost 5 bucks, man heís a fool
I popped the trip and felt it hit me
Fuck man it was spun, I felt so free
Got in the car and went for a drive
Man Iíll be lucky if I survive
Was going thirty down the freeway
I mustíve been there all bloody day
Pulled over and stepped out of my car
I couldnít at all see very far
I was trippiní out so fuckin much
That Iíve fully lost the sense of touch
Jumped in front of an oncoming car
The driver said "move" but I said "nah"
"but youíll bounce off of my chest" I said
Man I was so fucked up in the head
Sure enough, the dickhead ran me down
"It didnít work" I said with a frown
I was lying on the ground in pain
On top of that, it started to rain
After that shit, I started to shout
The traffic stopped and I passed out
I woke up in a hospital bed
With a damn stabbing pain in my head
I got some pain killers from the nurse
Things didnít get better, they got worse
Needed to get out of this fucked place
that dickhead doctor, cant stand his face
that nurse though, what a fucking honey
she constantly looked at me funny
theres no chance we could ever hook up
i already know she'll just say "nup"
then after 3 months I came out clean
it was the straightest I'd ever been
so there I was in the dead of night
I wanted to get high as a kite

...still gotta write the rest...
(dont hold your breath)

criticism welcome


-MrGrEeN 1999-2002